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How are skiing and sex alike? 10 ways

post #1 of 76
Thread Starter 
I heard this joke on the chair today, but the guy couldn't remember all the ways, and I can't remember all the ones he could recall..

Part of it was: both involve many tall tales
                     you're not as good as you think you are
                     something about face shots and one about deep being good

know the others?  make one up? just for fun to balance some of the harsh realism.
post #2 of 76
 "You can tell if someone is new, because they think faster is better."

I heard one saying something to the effect of the lift being the foreplay and the ride down taking half the time... Wasn't too great.
post #3 of 76
 From my own book:
Building a good quiver will help you achieve snowgasms
post #4 of 76
Size does matter.
post #5 of 76
A bad "outing" is always better then not going at all...

It's better with a friend.
post #6 of 76
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trekchick View Post

 From my own book:
Building a good quiver will help you achieve snowgasms

 

Nice, trekchick.

oh, I heard this yesteday and thought of you. the masters women were chatting before their run on the slalom course. One of the girls was in the gate and her friends were hooting it up for her: "chicks on sticks, yeah, hup, hup!"

A guy on the chair said something: He claimed skiing perfect untracked powder was BETTER than sex. He said that when he hit a line like that he would hoot and holler out loud with joy. He said he has never hooted and hollered having sex. I had to leave it at that, but it cracked me up.
post #7 of 76
My wife doesn't like either!
post #8 of 76

How many skiing partners have you had in the last year?

Counting my wife?

Yeah.

None.

post #9 of 76
Hahahahahah...  You don't want me to get started... 
post #10 of 76
Well, downhill racing is better than sex, I know that much...

post #11 of 76
Thread Starter 
as in, how many sex partners have you had in the past year? I'm slow, but I get it, ha!

Quote:
Originally Posted by goblue View Post

How many skiing partners have you had in the last year?

Counting my wife?

Yeah.

None.

post #12 of 76
here's a way they're not alike...

i actually know what i'm doiong when i'm skiing.
Edited by jahroy - 12/22/09 at 8:09am
post #13 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by jahroy View Post


here's a way they're not alike...

i actually know what i'm when skiing.



 


Grammar check?????
post #14 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by kermit88 View Post

My wife doesn't like either!

One of the best replies on this site in a long time
post #15 of 76

Well, the analogy certainly adds new perspective to the helmet, no helmet debate...
 

post #16 of 76
post #17 of 76
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crgildart View Post

This topic is older than I am (here anyway). 

Amazing Similarities between Sex and Skiing



What skiing movie title best describes your sex life?


 

The Tangerine (wet) Dream .........or Yearbook, as in once a year, or not since high school






Quote:
Originally Posted by akaplan9 View Post

Well, the analogy certainly adds new perspective to the helmet, no helmet debate...
 


As in A Helmet for Little Head ?






I think Jah is saying: I know what I'm doing when I'm skiing
as in: Sorry, I just can't find your ski.
post #18 of 76
Waiting on more replies... can't think of any besides 2 that were taken.
post #19 of 76
Hot waxing improves glide.
post #20 of 76
I love to take a nap after both!
post #21 of 76
Thread Starter 
you've got to get your mojo going!
post #22 of 76
Don't get enough of either one.

Maybe the diamond thing will help with these problems.
post #23 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alpinord View Post

Hot waxing improves glide.




Quote:
Originally Posted by davluri View Post




Nice, trekchick.

oh, I heard this yesteday and thought of you. the masters women were chatting before their run on the slalom course. One of the girls was in the gate and her friends were hooting it up for her: "chicks on sticks, yeah, hup, hup!"

A guy on the chair said something: He claimed skiing perfect untracked powder was BETTER than sex. He said that when he hit a line like that he would hoot and holler out loud with joy. He said he has never hooted and hollered having sex. I had to leave it at that, but it cracked me up.

RAWR!
post #24 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stranger View Post

Maybe the diamond thing will help with these problems.
Please explain. A diamond ring can help to 'widen a stance' (which wedding cake closes). Not sure if a diamond file helps to widen stance.

post #25 of 76
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alpinord View Post

Quote:

Please explain. A diamond ring can help to 'widen a stance' (which wedding cake closes). Not sure if a diamond file helps to widen stance.




 

really good







Quote:
Originally Posted by Stranger View Post

Don't get enough of either one.

Maybe the diamond thing will help with these problems.

EXACTLY!
post #26 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alpinord View Post

Hot waxing improves glide.

Heard a similar which went: A hot wax always improves the experience on what you are riding.
post #27 of 76
You think you look great doing it until you see a video of yourself 

Please don't post any for MA
post #28 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by kermit88 View Post

My wife doesn't like either!


Well, maybe not with you...
post #29 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by narc View Post

You think you look great doing it until you see a video of yourself 

Please don't post any for MA

hahahaha
post #30 of 76
I would cancel a day of appointments at work without hesitation to go skiing......
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