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English Signs from Around the World

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 

In a Bangkok temple:
IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN.

Cocktail lounge , Norway :
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

Doctors office, Rome :
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Dry cleaners, Bangkok :
DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.

In a Nairobi restaurant:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

On the main road to Mombassa, leaving Nairobi :
TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.

On a poster at Kencom:
ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN HELP.

In a City restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.

In a cemetery:
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES .

Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

In a Tokyo bar:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Hotel , Yugoslavia :
THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel , Japan :
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE
CHAMBERMAID.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.

A sign posted in Germany 's Black Forest :
IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Hotel, Zurich :
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand :
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen :
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

A laundry in Rome :
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.
 

post #2 of 6
 
Should the Beer Cheer be warm?
post #3 of 6
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trekchick View Post

 
Should the Beer Cheer be warm?

If it's a hand-pulled ale or bitter, then it should be served at cellar temp.
The reason for chilling beer is to disguise the lack of flavour.
post #4 of 6
In a shopping center in Moscow near the office I used to work in, there was a sign that was translated as something like
"Do not allow your valuables to be stolen" (the Russian version was worded much better)
as if I had a choice in the matter.

Theif: Excuse me, sir. Do you mind if I steal your wallet?
Me: Hmm, I'd better keep it. The sign told me not to let you take it.

But, my all-time favorite sign in English wasn't even a translation. In one of the lecture halls at my university, there was a door next to one of the stairways that had a sign which read
"This door is not an exit or an entrance."
Surely, if it's a door, then it has to be an exit and an entrance for something; otherwise, it would be a wall.
post #5 of 6
 Hey, CV, I noticed that you come from "The Crappest Town in Britain."  Is that where the monks brew Crappest Ale?  I understand it has a "skunky" flavor.  (Or as 'yall spell it: flavour.) 

I didn't know that there were Anglican monks.
post #6 of 6
Actually, I'm from Oklahoma (one of the crappest states in the US), though I've moved around a bit the last 10 years. This town got voted as the crappest town in Britain just a month or two before my company transferred me here, which is why I list it that way in my location . It's not that bad, but coming from Oklahoma, I'm used to it.

I'm not sure about Crappest Ale. You'll have to ask WTFH and others about that one. I know the English love their ales, but I definitely haven't seen any Anglican monks.

I really want to go skiing in Flims-Laax, Switzerland, so that I can get my picture taken next to the Crap Bar and get a T-shirt that says "Flims is Crap." (In the local dialect in that region, "crap" means "peak," hence the English play on words they do for some of their stuff.)
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