It's rolled around once again, like a stray cannonball on the deck of a sailing ship. Sept. 19 is the annual Talk Like a Pirate Day, for no particular reason whatsoever.
Thank John "OI' Chumbucket" Bauer and Mark "Cap'n Slappy" Summers, the two ne'er-do-wells with pirattitude for starting the tradition, and writer Dave Barry for popularizing it seven years ago. Bauer and Summers have two books available from publishers and three others they've self-published, including the children's book "A Li'l Pirate's A-B-Seas."
Not all pirate talk is fit for kids. Suggested pirate pickup lines include "Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?" and "How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?" As for "booty" and "treasure chest"... well keep those double meanings to yourself, you swarthy knave.
Los Angeles is home to a bounty of pirate-related events today, including sexy pirate talk and a costume contest at the R Bar in Koreatown, a pirate-themed murder mystery geocache hunt, and a weekend's worth of pirates and steampunk at the Queen Mary. Shiver me timbers.
-- Carolyn Kellogg
And all ye scurvy mutinous dogs better scurry up the yardarm and set the mainsels. Or I'll have the first mate give ye a talking to with the cat-o-nine-tales.
At least that's better than being slipped the fid.
And for those of ye who desire more booty. Try this on fer size.