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Bribery...for it or against it

post #1 of 10
Thread Starter 

Would you/do you bribe your kids to go skiing?  I have one kid that can be corrupted by bribery.  If I tell him that he can get breakfast/lunch/snacks at the mtn, he's more than happy to go along for the ride.  He's a skier that when he tries, he's pretty good and can ski all over the mtn but when he's not trying, he's skiing from the backseat, in the perma-wedge.  Time on the snow will help him...and I want him to enjoy skiing.  We buy season passes, so the money is already spent...so...to bribe or not to bribe, is the question.

post #2 of 10

Tell him if he gets to be real good he can skip school to go to races.

post #3 of 10

How old?

post #4 of 10

It seems odd to me that the "bribery" involves food.  If a child looks at restaurant food/snacks, which is generally loaded with fat and sugar and not healthy, as a motivator or reward then it does not bode well for his future eating habits.

post #5 of 10

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by mudfoot View Post

It seems odd to me that the "bribery" involves food.  If a child looks at restaurant food/snacks, which is generally loaded with fat and sugar and not healthy, as a motivator or reward then it does not bode well for his future eating habits.

 

 

ummm to eat the food and go outside is way heathier than staying inside and playing video games all day and most likely chowing down on equally unhealthy food.

 

It really isnt about what you eat it about what you do.

 

 

post #6 of 10

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by mudfoot View Post

It seems odd to me that the "bribery" involves food.  If a child looks at restaurant food/snacks, which is generally loaded with fat and sugar and not healthy, as a motivator or reward then it does not bode well for his future eating habits.

Let's face it. A lot of kids these days are denied very little. You try to draw the line at not eating junk every meal so what else can you bribe them with?  My son is 16 now. He'll tell you he only went skiing when he was younger because we "made" him. He loves it now and is always ready to go.

post #7 of 10

If you are getting the kids out skiing, no matter how you do it, then you probably have a healthier and happier family than most.  Reading the OP it occurred to me that the fact the child looked at the chance to eat ski area food as a prime motivator may be a more serious issue than the ethics of bribing him to go skiing.  In an effort to make our kids do things we know are good we often take the path of least resistance without thinking about it.  That is not bad parenting, just human nature.

 

After reading a couple weeks ago that 20% of US 4-year olds are "obese," I guess I am overly sensitive to the relationship of kids and what they eat.  I just thought that if you are going to be rewarding a kid for desired action, then you should be careful what you use as the reward.  Training a child to view eating unhealthy food as a reward may lead to him "rewarding" himself that way throughout the rest of his life.

 

A skiing child is more likely to be a better child in many ways, but there is more than one way to skin that cat, and I just wanted to point out that we have to be careful because motivating a child to do something good by giving them something a little bad may inadvertantly negate our intentions.

post #8 of 10
Thread Starter 

Well, tried the race/skip school idea but he said he'd rather go to school.  That one may work when he's a little older (he's 9 now).  He's not a very competitive kid, by nature.  (unless it's his younger brother, who quite frankly kicks his butt on the slopes and I don't want to foster that competition between them.  His quote was "I love the ice and bumps and the secret powder stashes." Younger brother usually wins in both the physical and academic department...maturity is a whole other matter.  Heck, even lil' sis is a ski monster...wants to just be out in the snow right now.)  Back to DS#1...

 

He's the type of kid that needs a push to do things (in particular...physical things).  I don't keep a lot of junk food at home.  The choices at home are pretty healthy (unless you are talking about my secret stash of chocolate.)  He doesn't receive rewards for good grades and he has to earn the things he wants (outside of Christmas and his birthday).  He eats pretty much everything that I make but the kid is tall and skinny, so obesiety isn't a concern right now...but could be if when he's older and on his own and decides to eat the junk food and not have some type of sport/physical activity that he likes to do.  If I can get him out on the mtn with the family, and help him get to a level where he can enjoy it, I'm hoping that is what shines through.   I guess my main objective is to help him find something that he can do after he's a kid and enjoy.  So with that...is it worth bribing the kid to get him going and hopefully by the time he's a little better, he's given skiing (or any other sport/activity) enough of a chance to actually enjoy it?  Is it worth using the carrot and maybe just a little of the stick approach?  (And I should say, this is outside of ski lessons...he seems to enjoy those...but he's not quite good enough to ski with some of his friends from school yet)  

 

post #9 of 10

Wow, when my daughter was nine it was her seventh season and she couldn't wait to go out skiing with mom since I worked full time it was our one-on-one time....

 

Sign him up for ski race training to he can hang with the "cool kids"?

 

I started the brainwashing when mine was six months old.  I'd walk to the hill with her and say look at all the people out there having fun.  One day that'll be you!

post #10 of 10

incentive compensation is a fundamental precept of human interaction. when does it constitute a "bribe" - depends on a multitude of factors. only humble suggestion i might have is incentives to do what he likes to do are probably the most effective for the longhaul when it comes to recreational endeavors

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