Found this one, funny......
Two Planks of Pure, Liquid Adrenaline - $300 (Denver)
The Facts:- 2005 K2 Apache X 181 length with 18 mm sidecuts. This pair of skis is classified as "all mountain" as in "all mountains bow down to the pure awesome these skis carve into their faces."
- Enamel red like the blood that will be bursting through your veins as you tear down a wicked face in these bad mothers.
- Enamel has a few chips because these sticks weren't just meant to be hung above a fireplace and fawned over, although I'm sure they wouldn't mind the fawning part.
- Sweet-ass Monarch sticker with Colorado flag background on one background. Irrefutable proof that these skis don't just know where the good snow flies, but they've been there, done that, left their marks.
- Perfect edges & bottoms. As in perfect for launching jumps. Perfect for bombing gullies. And perfect for making first tracks in some champagne powder.
- A few nicks in the wax, highlighting the awesomeness these skis have facilitated, and nothing a good servicing can't take care of. After all, who doesn't like a good servicing every once-in-a-while?
- These skis will attract the bunnies like nothing you've ever seen. It's like a bunny magnet laced with carrots and bunny diamonds. They got my ex plenty of action, I can guarantee you.
- 2007 Marker m1000 bindings. Bindings so sick that the previous year's model still sells for $200 and you can't even find the 07s anymore. In one word: choice.
- DIN 10. Sure, you could set the bindings to a 7 or 5 or even 1, but nothing says "I'm an extreme badass, look at how bad I am" like bindings set at DIN 10.
- Rode 10 times during the 07-08 season. Why only 10 times? That's like saying, "gee, this is wonderful Maine lobster and Kobe ribeye with shaved truffles and gold dust, but I think I'll pass on seconds." Well, my ex takes about the same care of his finances as his knees, so he had to put these babies away before the buds had poked through the snow. Now, instead of watching their red magnificence dulled by dust, he'd rather give them the chance to taste glorious, sweet snow, even if he can't.
He's a philanthropist in that way.
Think you can handle the challenge presented by these slices of molten lava? Shoot me an email.