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How to ski moguls...are you F ing kidding me?

post #1 of 88
Thread Starter 

So I saw this video on youtube and it just pissed me off. It just occurs to me that anyone who listens to this guy is in for a world of hurt. Not sure if perhaps this should be in a different forum, but anyway here it is.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncTrL6TpcrY

post #2 of 88

Yeah but check this out! Sweet Spread Eagle!

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_CQ1S5PaeeQ&feature=channel

 

Who the hell is this guy and why is he on our Internetz? 

post #3 of 88

Where was the blow up doll?

post #4 of 88

I didn't see anything actually "wrong" with it.  He didn't show us anything.  Standing in the parking lot talking is pretty weak.


Edited by tetonpwdrjunkie - Sun, 01 Feb 09 17:24:42 GMT
post #5 of 88

Whoa--that's a Keystone employee uniform in that clip! On behalf of Keystone, I want to apologize for this exceptionally poor "instructional" clip--and the several others on YouTube that feature the same person, in his uniform.

 

For the record, that is not a Keystone Ski & Ride School uniform, and neither this clip nor the person in it have any association whatsoever with the Keystone Ski & Ride School.

 

I'm looking into it! Thanks for pointing it out.

 

Best regards,

Bob Barnes

post #6 of 88

I've never skied moguls, and I probably never will unless it's by accident, but anyways. I am pretty sure thats not how I would ski moguls.

The funny part is, the way the video looks is like he couldn't afford to go to keystone, but wanted to make a video like he knew what he was doing. haha
Where is the action shots man!? oh you don't have them? Damn.

post #7 of 88

Bob you get a new uniform?

 

post #8 of 88

I wish I lived in expert village.

 

What is this snow skiing?

post #9 of 88

I'm sorry--these things make me want to cry! That "moguls" clip, atrocious as it is, isn't even the worst one. Check out the "How to Carve" clip, by the same guy (no, I'm not going to post a link!)

 

I'll bet you didn't know that carving was not "originally invented" by skiers. It was invented by snowboarders. In Europe.

 

post #10 of 88

So that's what I've been doing wrong. 

 

I personally liked the 'Advanced' stretching and the skiing backward video.

 

Are all instructors at Keystone that advanced?  

 

 

 

 

post #11 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob Barnes View Post

I'm sorry--these things make me want to cry!

 

Interesting.  I had the opposite reaction, because after watching a few of those videos of "advanced" skiing techniques, and thinking about how my skiing compares, I realize I'm a rock star and didn't even know it.

post #12 of 88

Theres one called, get this..."Tips for skiing on level ground"...

post #13 of 88

OK, I'll post it for extreme hilarity purposes only.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=agnwH4Upe3w

 

Straighten out that hat, loser!  The skiing at the end of the clip is priceless tough.  This guy has never carved a turn in his life but it's a pretty good rendition of the cha-cha for all you dance fans. 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bob Barnes View Post

I'm sorry--these things make me want to cry! That "moguls" clip, atrocious as it is, isn't even the worst one. Check out the "How to Carve" clip, by the same guy (no, I'm not going to post a link!)

 

I'll bet you didn't know that carving was not "originally invented" by skiers. It was invented by snowboarders. In Europe.

 

 

post #14 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Woodstocksez View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob Barnes View Post

I'm sorry--these things make me want to cry!

 

Interesting.  I had the opposite reaction, because after watching a few of those videos of "advanced" skiing techniques, and thinking about how my skiing compares, I realize I'm a rock star and didn't even know it.


 

I'm with you Woodstock ...I must be freekin amazing!!!! LOL

post #15 of 88

I'd forgotten about this clown; the claim that carving was invented by snowboarders brought it all back- ROFL.

post #16 of 88

This would be much more useful to me if you would go over point by point where he errs.  I realize there is quite a bit; start with the first few points.

post #17 of 88

The stupidest guy on skis also has a video on How to Ski Rails. One little problem: he's on boxes not rails!

 

YouTube - Advanced Snow Skiing Tips & Techniques : How to Ski Rails: Snow Skiing Tips

post #18 of 88

Wow, where is that parking lot - I just have to sign up for a lesson from this JONG.  Heck I have never had a lesson (ski lesson) oops  (snow ski lesson) in a parking lot.   Where do I sign up?   Maybe if I sign up right away I can learn to snow ski as well as this premier instructor.  Then I could cancel ESA at Big Sky and save oddles of $.

 

But I won't NOLO would tell me I have disconnected myself from my brain.  LOL

post #19 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jag View Post

So that's what I've been doing wrong. 

 

I personally liked the 'Advanced' stretching and the skiing backward video.

 

Are all instructors at Keystone that advanced?  

 

 

 

 

 

Yea, I was wondering if all the keystone classes are offsight in a parkinglot on rocks to screw up your gear.

 

Oh, I get the rocks thing.
Thats a deal to get you to screw up your gear so they get your money when you have to buy new gear.

 

Just dont wear your hat like this idiot, they have a bill for a reason, to keep the F-in sun out of your eyes.
I cannot stand hats on incorrectly.


Edited by Talyn - Mon, 02 Feb 09 02:14:49 GMT
post #20 of 88

The biggest bozo instructor I ever worked with was also famous for parking lot lessons.  He tried to eat a bunch of  hot peppers to imress some girls one night after clinics.  He immediately sucked down two pitchers in a panic and was stumbling around in the parking lot putting snow in his mouth while a cop car pulled up.  I wish I had video of that I could post

 

His name weas Rodley something.  He got fired.  Anybody think they know him?  He probably got and lost an instuctor job about every year or two. 

post #21 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phlogiston View Post

I'd forgotten about this clown; the claim that carving was invented by snowboarders brought it all back- ROFL.

 

Yea.
That sounds about wrong.
I would not believe that to save my life.


Since when does carving make an S?

WTH.

I need to learn how to ski an S while on one edge of my ski. Last I checked the skis turn left when I tip them to the left, and I cannot turn right to complete the S. WTF. This dude is way to advanced for me. He's the master....

post #22 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by carvemeister View Post

OK, I'll post it for extreme hilarity purposes only.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=agnwH4Upe3w

 

Straighten out that hat, loser!  The skiing at the end of the clip is priceless tough.  This guy has never carved a turn in his life but it's a pretty good rendition of the cha-cha for all you dance fans. 

 

Dude, why would you even post that!
You are wrong.

WTH was he even doing in the end of the video? if that is carving, I quit skiing. hahaha.

Hell, he was slide turning and his ski's didn't even stay parralell like he suggested you do while turning. haha.

Maybe he should go back to europe and snow board.

post #23 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob Barnes View Post

Whoa--that's a Keystone employee uniform in that clip! On behalf of Keystone, I want to apologize for this exceptionally poor "instructional" clip--and the several others on YouTube that feature the same person, in his uniform.

 

For the record, that is not a Keystone Ski & Ride School uniform, and neither this clip nor the person in it have any association whatsoever with the Keystone Ski & Ride School.

 

I'm looking into it! Thanks for pointing it out.

 

Best regards,

Bob Barnes


 

He may not be a Keystone instructor, but I bet that he spent the night at a Holiday Inn Express.

 

Dennis


Edited by Denny1969 - Mon, 02 Feb 09 02:27:01 GMT
post #24 of 88

Didn't you look at his feet?  They weren't even close to parallel.  They were in a V . Obviously he's from Vail - I learned that from Bob.

On second thought, that might be an advanced mogul technique since the moguls will press the tips back together.  Hmm, could be the new super invisible phantom move.

post #25 of 88

His boots were imatating the new angles the hawks have. An outward toe for a more advanced persons style couldnt you see that. OMG some one shoot me! Ive seen 5 year olds do better spead eagles also. Hes just jokeing isnt he?

post #26 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by whipper View Post

His boots were imatating the new angles the hawks have. An outward toe for a more advanced persons style couldnt you see that. OMG some one shoot me! Ive seen 5 year olds do better spead eagles also. Hes just jokeing isnt he?

I'm pretty sure he is dead serious.

There would be a dissclamer someplace otherwise.

post #27 of 88

He does coin a new phrase "Body shifting"

Thing is, if he really knew how to carve he'd do it at night.  I bet he's not that advanced! I almost skied at night at Keystone a couple weeks ago...too hard though.  Some guy came and took my skis too, said his name was Bob!  Had a Keystone jacket on also!  Then he tried to sell me a pair of skis with the word "Lady" on them.  That's when I knew it was time to leave...

 

On that guys videos with the car noise in the background I keep expecting him to get hit like in those police videos.

post #28 of 88

CHAOS ?

post #29 of 88

I'm not sure that the guy's videos could really do much harm, even if someone were foolish enough to take them seriously, as he conveys virtually no information.

 

- I don't know who invented carving. I can tell you with great certainty that Warren Witherell discussed it at length in "How the Racers Ski," which was first published in 1972.

 

- The guy clearly isn't much of a skier.


Edited by sjjohnston - Mon, 02 Feb 09 18:04:19 GMT
post #30 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by 4ster View Post

CHAOS ?

 

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