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Analysis/critique of technique

post #1 of 21
Thread Starter 
Zis photo has come to my immediate attention.

Vot advice could you provide zis particular gap...uhhh...i mean SKIER (a gut friend of mine). I told him to lose ze gay purple fleece und equally gay headband. He might as vell be sporting rainbow flags on his skis!

[img]http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0OgAAAAQV6GIlqvVqMozRQAoC2FfEQy3SOhuCsZgmiG!Dmeb*e dUsPq6cAUlyHBPWkOCh2nE!KKwv!jXrbtfgTwGJ99tpWj3G/FXturn.jpg[/img]

[ August 15, 2002, 01:31 AM: Message edited by: Arnold Schwarzenegger ]
post #2 of 21
Thread Starter 
When I ask a bunch of qvestions I vant zem answered IMMEDIATELY
post #3 of 21
he sux cuz he no's yew
post #4 of 21
Dude's got it goin' on. Shreds like a...oh, I dunno...a Superstar?

EDIT: no, no, no. i spoke too soon. upon closer inspection, i see a weight distribution about 3.6% too much to the rear. otherwise, soo-pah.

EDIT 2: no, no, no. spoke too soon again. make that a mere 2.678% in the back. yeah. that's more like it.

EDIT 3: Yo, Ahh-nlld. Take it o'er to Pow. Those cats can REALLY break it down for ya.

[ August 15, 2002, 02:48 PM: Message edited by: ryan ]
post #5 of 21
It looks to me like his left ski pole is bent.

Hope this helps.

post #6 of 21
Isn't that ###############?
post #7 of 21
This photo was taken a millisecond before this unfortunate person dropped onto his right hip: I submit that the person is uttering a tell-tale expletive by the contraction of facial muscles and the O-shape of his lips.
post #8 of 21
Over dependency on his walking frame ... probably developed in early childhood ... note the subtle influence of middle school "yo bro" hand movements. Common symptom is the tendency to knock over drinks while talking due to being easily wound.

[ August 16, 2002, 06:21 AM: Message edited by: man from oz ]
post #9 of 21
I hate these pictures. Next thing you know he will be a world champion skier in sheeps clothing!

He skis from the big toe side and pulls his outside hand across his upper body making his next turn difficult to initiate efficiently. Look out right hip I'm coming in for a landing.

Have a GREAT day!
post #10 of 21
Rotated, no inside-leg activity, hips down, back, and inside, and as a result, his skis are skidding grotesquely. His mother was probably a bad skier too, and his skiing reveals signs of a troubled childhood, with severe psychological damage. In short, he ZUCKS. The picture isn't worth much either--too dark, too small, and showing serious interlacing artifacts from a digital video camera. Let's see, what else can I criticize here?

You're right on with your assessment of his outfit, too, Arnold, although you failed to mention his meat-platter belt buckle--gotta go. And his pole IS bent.

Tell your friend that it is the considered opinion of the EpicSki community that he should probably take up knitting or dominoes or snowboarding or something.

(Is there a tongue-in-cheek smiley?)


Best regards,
Bob Barnes

[ August 20, 2002, 05:43 PM: Message edited by: Bob Barnes/Colorado ]
post #11 of 21
Originally posted by Bob Barnes/Colorado:
...And his pole IS bent...
I have made it!
Bob Barnes agrees with ME

I think it's time I retired from ski instruction - you know, go out on a high, etc...

post #12 of 21
Does pole straightness constitute ski instruction? - not sure but well done none the less.
It wasn't very nice of you though making Bob agree with you, I mean he looks like a fool now having to agree with WTFH. Not very nice at all - he is so upset he hasn't even replied yet- you see what you've done.

I don't know how you guys can see all that from one picture - it's amazing how much you can analyse someone from one photo. He looks fine to me - not fine in the sexual sense fine in the skiing sense. He really shouldn't have studied History in his final year at school though - definitely influenced his lines.
post #13 of 21
Your humour is making me worry that you will soon be considered part of the WTFH Borg collective. (I'm waiting for Seven to make an appearance, then I won't mind the idea of several people being part of me )

I just looked at the photo again, and maybe it's the quality of the screen I'm using, but he reminds me of Poochie from episode 4F12 of The Simpsons. Anyone else notice the similarity?

post #14 of 21
Don't worry about that. I don't think I could ever be assimilated as I have far too much personality and certainly have a rather unique style of skiing that would render assimilation rather difficult!! We would be please to associate with WTFH for the assimilation of certain groups on the slopes however as we see them as a menace to the collective. (Too much Star Trek me thinks! - watched Picard's first contact with the Borg again the other day, very funny!)
Unfortunately it is the quality of screen you are using. Poochie is left handed whereas this gentleman is obviously right handed, a common mistake but not one I would have thought you would make WTFH in your highly enlightened state.
post #15 of 21
May I correct you...
As was ascertained by myself higher up this post, and agreed by Sir Bob, this guy's LEFT pole is bent, whereas, his right pole seems OK. This issue would have arisen because he was relying more heavily on his LEFT side than his RIGHT, which normally occurs in people who are, guess what, LEFT handed.

Now, you are going to tell me that he swapped poles. That, my dear boy, is an assumption. And we all know about what happens when you assume something.
So, it is blatantly obvious to me, and any sensate being that this life form is left handed. I must now thank you for adding weight to my argument that this person could indeed be the aforementioned Poochie.

post #16 of 21
Let me reply if you would,
The reason that his left pole is broken is because he has less control with his left hand and could therefore not control the bend as it happened. This would certainly not happen to someone who was left handed, this was a terrible accident and one that should be looked at in the correct light. It is therefore obvious to me that he must be right handed gentleman as anyone knows that he would not have bent the pole to such an extreme angle if he were in total control of the pole which he certainly would be if he were left handed, the only conclusion therefore is that he is right handed, and therefore I am right and you sir are wrong.
Besides after extensive analysis using very expensive computer software it is obvious from the wear and tear on the gloves that he uses his right hand much more extensively than his left and is therefore right handed.
Sorry to be quite so right.
post #17 of 21
You could not be more wrong. You could try, but you would fail.
If we return to the photograph in question, and not what your 48k ZX Spectrum (running Jet Set Willy) is telling you, you can notice that his right ski pole is dragging. He doesn't have the strength in his right arm to keep it forward! As for the wear and tear on his gloves, consider his employment. He spends all day with his left hand outstretched looking for 10p for a cup of tea, and his right hand resting on the ground beside his dog, hence the wear on his right glove. I would have thought that you, of all people would have understood that.
I shall ask the waitress in the hotel tonight if the chef would prepare a special meal, if so, you are invited to join me for a meal one evening. For dessert, I shall have the summer pudding & clotted cream, and you can have a large helping of humble pie.

post #18 of 21
You don't need to reduce yourself to the level of blatant insults - my computer has just been upgraded thank you very much it is not 50k so you can stop that now. Oh yes and I have a little moveable thing on the side called a rat or mouse or gerbil - something small and rodenty anyway. Not sure what it does - please advise.
Back to the picture, this gentleman most certainly does not drink tea. It is surely obvious to all that he is a coffee drinker from the head band that he is most certainly not English and therefore does not partake of this wonderful most guarded secret that we call tea.
The reason that he can't lift his right hand when skiing is because he is on holiday and therefore decided to give his overused right hand a well earned rest and is therefore trying to do more with his left hand. It's also possible that he has just turned to the right and therefore his hand hasn't recovered from the plant that he just did (sorry someone's talking at me at the same time so just came out with some rubbish there but can't find the delete key.)
I will eat the humble pie that you are buying for me but only to show you that you are paying and are therefore acknowledging the fact that you are so wrong that you are not even right enough to eat any humble pie, that you are so far gone through wrong and out the other side that humble pie is far too right for you. Sorry to be so right again but one day you will have to acknowledge this and as for that PM about putting the humble pie somewhere else I really think that is a bit out of order and certainly uncalled for.
post #19 of 21
Just want to clarify one thing from the PM...

ORAL = of the mouth

I think you've got your ORs and your ANs mixed up.

post #20 of 21
To be honest, Loke, the thing beside your keyboard isn't a rodent, it looks like a paintbrush & pallet to me...
Loke's computer

post #21 of 21
Oh damn you've already seen one then, I thought it was new and exciting!!
Your far too funny for me sir I must bow to your superior humour!
The most annoying thing is that I just had to install a new super fast (1.7 GHz) computer for some guy who has no idea how to use one. Most irritating, he won't even know how amazing it is and I do and can't blinking use it.
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