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Breaking news!

post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 
Breaking News: CNN has announced that the screens on gas pumps will now be showing porn while you fill up your tank - so you can watched someone else getting screwed at the same time you are!!!
post #2 of 15
Shouldn't you be in court?

It's nine O'Clock Bears; do you know where your lawyer is?
post #3 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yuki View Post
Shouldn't you be in court?

It's nine O'Clock Bears; do you know where your lawyer is?
If your lawyer isn't screwing you then they are certainly screwing someone else.:
post #4 of 15
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crgildart View Post
If your lawyer isn't screwing you then they are certainly screwing someone else.:
. . . which is what you're paying him to do because you can't do it yourself.
post #5 of 15
Touche, Obes!

Lawyers are necessary because there are idiots and players in the world who don't care about the rules of society. We need lawyers. What we don't need is
POLITICIANS.
post #6 of 15
Don't lawyers generally become politicians? :
post #7 of 15
To the best of my recollection most politicians are lawyers. Ask Hillary, it comes in handy I guess. But then there is the occasional movie actor, astronaut, & a few other ordinary or out of the ordinary skills base that are elected. But usually lawyers.
post #8 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonni View Post

Lawyers are necessary because there are laws written by them that prohibit understanding by anyone who hasn't forked over the $$ to learn their secret language.
There I fixed it for you.
post #9 of 15
From King Lear ....

...... "A knave; a rascal; an eater of broken meats; a base, proud, shallow, beggardly, three suited, worsted-stocking knave; a lily-livered, action taking knave, a whoreperson, glass gazing, super-servicible financial rogue ... "



..... "a coward, panderer and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch .... " :

..... "one who I will beat with clamorous whining ... " :

Willy didn't mince words did he?

That kind of says it all donja'think?
post #10 of 15
Thread Starter 
Next time anyone "needs" a lawyer, just do it yourself.

Considering that the attorneys with whom I work, and I, have almost nothing to do with the "lawyer stuff" that seems to be obnoxious to so many, it's puzzling why electric industry lawyers dealing with each other pisses off so many people who don't even know what we do. I happen to be General Counsel of an electric company that is owned by the homes and businesses it serves - and we have no greater joy than in giving our owners (the customers) as much of what they want as possible.

As for politicians who are lawyers, in Vermont, most legislators are NOT lawyers. We've had a few Governors who were lawyers, and we've had many who weren't (inlcuding the incumbent). Not one of the candidates for Governor of Vermont at this time is a lawyer.

Perhaps it makes sense to some (as it does to me) that people who are interested in making law actually study law. From working in the vineyards of law in Vermont for over forty-two year, I've seen no evidence that the laws of this state are so arcane that no one understands them. There's a law against stealing, a law against assaulting, a law against kidnapping . . . and of course, we have lawyers (called "prosecutors") who devote their professional skills to protecting us by enforcing those laws. I did that work at one time, and the general populace seemed to be pleased that I was doing it. Of course, the criminals who were convicted weren't so happy.

Yes, I AM somewhat pissed off at the "lawyer" jokes, because based upon the professional world in which I work, they make no sense - and because it's a phenomenally broad over generalization that subjects an entire profession to ridicule - a profession that's based upon an orderly and fair society rather than anarchic chaos.

If you don't like to live in a society governed by laws made by lawmakers chosen by the majority, go live in a place where the laws are made some other way. And if you just don't like laws and anyone who's learned how to deal with them, go find yor own turf and live in anarchy. If you're more powerful than the other people in your anarchic world, you might like that. Probably the others wouldn't.

The plethora of jokes about both lawyers and politicians does nothing to improve either profession, and it absolves anyone who chooses not to participate in the system of any repsonsibility for it. If you want to make jokes about gutless dishonesty, try that.
post #11 of 15
Easy Oboe ... down ..... down and easy! :

I constantly make fun of my gubberment job ... that has a lot to do with law & lawyers.

And, possibly .... came real close .... real close ... to attending law school. With a family in my mid 30's it was impossible because of the location (hour and a half each way for the closest), and the actual hours (12 mimimum), per semester ..... no part timers allowed in NJ law schools.

:
post #12 of 15
Oboe - I did not make fun of lawyers here. Didn't even take a poke at a politician. Even though I'm thinking of a particular one that is in desperation and certainly hopes the lawyers he has are very very good. I'm sure they can't work magic for him though.
post #13 of 15
We should go one further and talk about giving up rights to trial under the guise of "frivolous lawsuits" or "torte reform".

... then again that's not funny and this is a funny section
post #14 of 15
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ct55 View Post
We should go one further and talk about giving up rights to trial under the guise of "frivolous lawsuits" or "torte reform".

... then again that's not funny and this is a funny section
Torte reform?! Now they're picking on those poor, defenseless pastries?!
post #15 of 15
And those .... frivolous lawnsuits ..... cheeeesh!
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