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Are you a Democrat, Republican or Redneck?

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 
What are you? Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Redneck?

Here is a little test that will help you decide.

The answer can be found by posing the following question:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children.

Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife,
and charges at you.

You are carrying a 45 cal. Kimber 1911 ACP, and you are an expert shot.

You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?

THINK CAREFULLY AND THEN SCROLL DOWN:



Democrat's Answer:>

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his
hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound
me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away
while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier,
healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for few days and try to come
to a consensus.
.................................................. ..........................>



Republican's Answer:

"BANG!"




.................................................. ..........................



Redneck's Answer:


"BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG !"


"Click" ..... (Sounds of reloading)>


"BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!"


"Click"


Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the 'Winchester Silver Tips' or 'Hollow Points'?"

Son: "Can I shoot the next one?!"


Wife: "You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!"
post #2 of 17
As a child of the 60s I generally would have to say none of the above. HOWEVER, based on the choices given, I would have to say Republican, "don't hold me back", I gotta go register:
post #3 of 17
I don't carry the gun, because any time I'm not actually carrying it for one reason or another, it's too easy for some idiot with no brains or training to pick it up and point it at me. If they manage to stay out of my reach, that might even work for them, which would be bad for me.

However, our terrorist has a small problem. He's carrying a knife, and I'm highly trained in krav maga. If he makes the mistake of getting close enough, I'll take the knife away from him and give him the gift of injuries requiring an extended hospital stay. And without training, it's unlikely that he is able to throw it in any kind of useful fashion.

That's one of the problems with both knives and guns. Too many people with little or no training think they know how to use them - and they do, sort of like someone who can slide and turn and stop in a wedge "knows" how to use a pair of skis.

Weapons, whether hands, knives or guns, require discipline and dedication to really use well, as they should.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mkevenson View Post
As a child of the 60s I generally would have to say none of the above. HOWEVER, based on the choices given, I would have to say Republican, "don't hold me back", I gotta go register:
Go register!?!: As a libertarian, I gotta say we don't need none o' that gummint registration. Smaller gummint and more freedom, sez I!
post #4 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Treewell View Post

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the 'Winchester Silver Tips' or 'Hollow Points'?"
Sorry, thanks for playing. Winchester Silver Tips are hollow points.

Trick question.
post #5 of 17
Relying on martial arts training against an armed individual (knife or gun), is pure fools folly.

You stand a better chance than an untrained civilian ..... but the saftey gap is not as wide as you think.
post #6 of 17

None of the above

We all know that Bush killed all the terrorists and there are none in America.

Must have just been another American homeless vet with PTSD forgoten by the Bush admin looking for some change.
post #7 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yuki View Post
Relying on martial arts training against an armed individual (knife or gun), is pure fools folly.

You stand a better chance than an untrained civilian ..... but the saftey gap is not as wide as you think.
I don't know if it's part of your martial arts training or not, but just a wee bit of experience will tell you not to take any chances when you're attacked. Your life is in danger. Bang! Bang! Observe. Repeat as needed.
Does that make me a red-necked republican?
post #8 of 17
Bang!

But I'm still a Democrat.
post #9 of 17
I'm a ski instructor so I would just MA the technique. "Listen, dude, you need to bring the knife back all the way, but keep the blade moving forward throughout the turn."
post #10 of 17
Turns out it was a blind guy waving a tin cup. Republican thought he saw an "Islamic Terrorist" and shot him dead. Democrat saw a beggar and put a dollar in his cup. Redneck saw a beggar and shot him anyway.
post #11 of 17
Blind beggar my ***! Prollaly Shiek Omar Abdel Rachman ... aka ... "The Blind Cleric"

Jack in another clip and put in a few rounds to be sure ... aw ... hell ... just drag the lifeless corpse out in the street and wait for a city bus. 45 auto rounds are getting expensive.

:

In one of lifes little oddities, I was in the mosque of the Blind Cleric a few days before the first WTC bombing.
post #12 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by telerod15 View Post
Turns out it was a blind guy waving a tin cup. Republican thought he saw an "Islamic Terrorist" and shot him dead. Democrat saw a beggar and put a dollar in his cup. Redneck saw a beggar and shot him anyway.
...and the Democrats raised taxes in order to give him a proper funeral.
post #13 of 17
US Amry Prison Guard Answer:



Show him wife's boobs:
post #14 of 17

oink!

I would throw a fist full of bacon at him......and then when he was down toss a pickled pig's foot to finish him off!
post #15 of 17
PAP! PAP!

I'm a Conservative. I double tap.
post #16 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by stevesmith7 View Post
Sorry, thanks for playing. Winchester Silver Tips are hollow points.

Trick question.
Not quite. Silvertip hollow points are hollow points, but the only .45 cal Silvertip offered is the hollow point. Rilfe calber ammunition is available in a Silvertip (designated merely as Silvertip) soft point as well as a hollow point. In earlier years it might have been that soft point pistol ammunition was designated as Sivertip.
post #17 of 17
I'd shoot him in the leg.
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