@skibum4ever How lucky can one be to have the double whammy! I was one of them last year so may be able to help with your questions. Feel free to PM me any time. We are all here to support each other to conquer this horrible injury. This injury is SERIOUS!! One Doctor told me short of getting taken out by a train this is as serious as it gets!! Now for some answers to your questions
A raised chair with a foot stool worked best for me. I used a strap to power each leg one at a time to stand. When sitting use a towel or something to reduce friction under the feet so you can slide the legs out while sitting. Lift each leg one at a time with a strap onto the footstool. To get up just reverse the process but you need friction to stand so no towel under the feet.
He will be able to use a walker to get up and down. The therapists at the hospital will show him. I was walking the day after surgery. I was locked straight for 6 weeks so walked like Frankenstein for that period.
Toilet....I used a portable toilet but cut the bottom out of the pot and retofitted onto the toilet which resulted in a raised seat with a splash guard. My wife loved this one as she was the clean up person.
Bed. We have a 2 story house and used the living room as my sleeping room. Rented an electric hospital bed for 8 weeks until I could struggle my way up stairs.
Transportation to appointments is challenging. GET HIM A WHEELCHAIR!! It will save you as much as him. When he says no tell him to shut up and be a good quiet patient. I sat backwards in our station wagon to get to appointments. Maybe not the safest but I didn't really care because it worked!
Showering, stair climbing did not happen until 8 weeks with me. And you will need a shower chair to do it safely. As for going away to condos and such....best guess would be 10-12 weeks. Self sufficient will depend on his recovery. 10-12 week would be my best guess. He should do OK alone during the day after a week or 2.
Hope this helps