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Why does everyone hate Texans?

post #1 of 16
Thread Starter 
I know I'm asking for it, BIG TIME, but why does everyone seem to hate Texans? Is it bad skiing, bad attitudes, something else, all of the above?

P.S. Hoping people from Texas aren't so bad that this can't make it in the Humor Forum. :

P.S.S. Although I'm not a native Texan (born in Alaska, raised in southern Arizona), my kids are. Is it already too late for them? I'd like to think we're raising them to be gracious and responsible human beings, and to act like guests at someone else's house when we're on vacation, but maybe I'm missing something.

Have at it!!! :

DEP
post #2 of 16
Holy schizz. You mean if I meet a Texan I'm supposed to hate em'?

OK pardner, you got it. More en' glad to oblige.

Now shag your Tony Lama wearing cactus prickled butt outa here!
post #3 of 16
Thread Starter 
Aaah -- but you're from the Northeast, Yuki. You probably just haven't been around sufficient numbers to have formed a strong negative opinion.

I think it's something like being from New Jersey, but since I've never been to New Jersey, or skied in the Northeast, I could be totally wrong about this.
post #4 of 16
Best friend in the Navy was a guitar pickin Texan .... orphan son who lived with his wildcatter uncle town to town.

And if you come across Jimmy D. Nicodemus ... now that not as in James .. it's as in Jimmy ... tell him I lookin for him.
post #5 of 16
People are suspicious of them because they are so quiet and soft spoken.
post #6 of 16
Here's one reason: They drive those tricked-out pickup trucks that are only 2-wheel-drive with regular tires. It's a barrel of laughs watching them try to make it up Ski Hill Road or Village Road to the base in the snow, blocking all the resort buses and properly-equipped guests. Unless you happen to be sitting on one of those resort buses trying to get to the mountain.

Texas: probably the biggest market for 2 Wheel Drive SUVs - that's like a box of Viagra without the pills inside.
post #7 of 16
I don't hate Texans....but I do think TurDuckEn is weird. Which seems to be a purely Texas thing. Of course, I don't really eat land animals, which most Texans would probably think is weird.

Oh, and also, you can't beat Philly....at home....with Jessica Simpson there.
post #8 of 16
Thread Starter 
Oooh, Mike, I think I've read about TurDuckEn, but never seen one or known anyone who has actually done that. Personally, I have an objection to eating anything that has "turd" as part of the name!
post #9 of 16
Quote:
Originally Posted by MarkXS View Post
Texas: probably the biggest market for 2 Wheel Drive SUVs - that's like a box of Viagra without the pills inside.
It might have something to do with lack of snow/ice in Texas.
post #10 of 16
Quote:
Originally Posted by DEP View Post
Personally, I have an objection to eating anything that has "turd" as part of the name!
Pretty solid policy. It's also somewhat strange to keep stuffing animals into larger ones ad infinitum. I mean, I am sure the turkey would fit into a pig, which could then go into a cow...why stop there? Horses are big. Then elephant, maybe....yummy.
post #11 of 16
What does the "en" stand for?

Back in the days before butterball, turkey tended to be too dry, so it was traditional to cook it with a goose to use the abundant goose fat to baste the turkey. Making an all-in-one package with a duck is sort of logical. Never seen it done, tho...
post #12 of 16
Bcuz they say stuff like " NOOKULAR " and have nicknames like "Kenny BOY" or "Brownie" and some are Big hat /No cattle


seriously my college roomie was a great ole texan , and several former colleague are now Lone Star staters
post #13 of 16
Quote:
Originally Posted by mdf View Post
What does the "en" stand for?
The "en" is chicken. So a TurDuckEn (unless modified as suggested above) is chicken stuffed in a duck stuffed in a turkey. It seems morally and palate-ably (sp?) reprehensible.
post #14 of 16
A Texas rancher is on vacation up in Maine and he pull up to a Mainer' Tater Patch .. in his big ol' Caddy with the longhorns on the hood. He stops by the old Mainer who is fixing his old Allis Chalmers by the road and strikes up a conversation.

Texan .... "Nice little place yall' got here! But down in Texas, it takes me three days just to drive around my ranch ..."

Mainer ... "Ahhh .. had a car like that myself once ... "

post #15 of 16
I don't hate Texicans. And I don't think most fine upstanding New Jersey folks do. (Yuki... can you confirm...)

I've got some relatives down there. Originally from Boston, so they speak with a real interesting accent now.


They're just... different.

They're always "fixin' to" do something.

They have movie rentals, ammunition, and bait all in the same store.

My cousin Chris has a car transmission in his bedroom closet. And he keeps a can of RAID on the kitchen table.

It's a different world down there.
post #16 of 16
Ron White is my favorite comic .... period and hands down!

If ... now .... if Texas had hills and snow I could live there.

Oh .... and if we had a boarder .. that would be a nice addition.
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