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Alaska Bear Hunt

post #1 of 4
Thread Starter 
Frank was excited about his new rifle and decided to try bear hunting. He traveled up to Alaska, spotted a brown bear and shot it. Soon after there was a tap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a big black bear. The black bear said, "That was a very bad mistake. That was my cousin. I'm going to give you two choices. Either I maul you to death or we have sex." After considering briefly, Frank decided to accept the latter alternative. So the black bear had his way with Frank. Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Frank soon recovered and vowed revenge.

Frank headed out on another trip to Alaska where he found that black bear and shot it dead. Right afte r, there was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him.

The grizzly said, "That was a big mistake, Frank. That was my cousin and you've got two choices: Either I maul you to death or we have "rough sex." Again, Frank thought it was better to cooperate with the grizzly bear than be mauled to death. So the grizzly had his way with Frank. Although he survived, it took several months before Frank fully recovered.

Now Frank was completely outraged, so again,he headed back to Alaska and managed to track down that big bad grizzly bear and shot it dead. He felt sweet revenge, but moments later, there was a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to find a humongous polar bear standing there. The polar bear looked Frank square in the eyes and said, "Admit it Frank, you don't come here for the hunting, do y
post #2 of 4
But whatabout the fly the fish the mouse and the pussy??
post #3 of 4
Looks like Frank is being a pussy in this story and is definitely in big trouble!
post #4 of 4

Frank takes up bird watching ..

Having tired of his adventures in the Great Alaskan North, our hero Frank decided to take up bird watching.

Walking down a forest path, Frank encountered a fellow, a bit odd, with his arms locked around a large tree and his ear pressed tight to the bark.

Frank ... What are you doing?

Stranger ... Why I'm listening to the tree music!

Now Frank had never heard tell of such a thing and he was a bit wary, but the stranger was quite convincing and urged Frank to give it a try. :

Frank ... I don't hear a thing, I can't hear any tree music!

Stranger ... Wrap your arms tighter, all around the tree and press your ear hard to the bark.

Well Frank hugged the tree tight as he could when suddenly, he heard the clink of metal! The stranger had snapped handcuffs on Frank. He then proceed around the tree, removed Frank's trousers and had his way with him! :

It seemed like hours had passed and Frank hollered for help. Finally he heard a voice.

Stranger #2 ... Well, what do we have here? Looks like you have a problem!

Frank ... Gawd, I'm glad you're here, but do you have tools, how will you get these handcuffs off me?

he came around behind Frank and whispered ...

Stranger #2 .... Get them off? This just isn't your day now is it cupcake?

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