What Is A Gaper?

I always thought it meant that their ski is longer than yours, ...no?

Of course there are those that think a gaper is defined by the gap between the helmet and goggles:



This of course is incorrect as it is merely a symptom of a much larger malady. The term gaper comes from the tendency of the neophyte to allow his chin to drag as he watches in awe, more accomplished skiers, whom we presume are not gapers. I am convinced that the term is on a sliding scale as I continue to experience the jaw slacking when I witness incredible feats of either daring or stupidity, leaving me to conclude that sometimes I is, and sometimes I isn't a gaper.



My last endeavor to exhibit gaperish behavior, was on a hike to Beaver at Alpine Meadows last spring with a bunch of maggots when I inadvertently carried my skis incorrectly on my shoulder in a way that the brakes did not interlock, thus leading to the much feared long and short ski (you better duck) head scissor.


In a terrible twist of irony, those most likely to be a "gaper" are the least likely to know what one is.
Remember that if people are clicking your picture, while at the resort base or in the lift line, it is unlikely because of your prowess and skiing radness, and more likely that you could be exhibiting the quintessential essence of gaper.

Spot on! You've nailed it!

Funny

Any discussion of 'Gaper' needs to include its partner, 'Poser'. Any elaboration on what Poser means?

A gaper is anyone you think is less cool than you.

A poser is anyone who thinks he's cooler than you.

How do you PRONOUNCE it?

Are we talking "gap" or "gape"?

A poser is someone who talks a good story, but doesn't have many skills.

An acquaintance of mine, who is the parent of kids who race with my son and daughter proved to be the quintessential poser. Prior to skiing together, I was told glorious stories of her past race days and her epic skiing ability. The first and only time I skied with her was at Castle Mt. after a modest dump of 10 or 12 inches. We found her part way down the mountain - zig zagging across an untracked run and falling at the end of every zig and zag. Not to abandon anyone, a friend skied down with her, only to bemoan the hour of missed powder.

In the bike world, a poser is someone who doesn’t ride very much, but has all the best equipment and clothing - poses the part.

Bill, as you know, if it was "gap" we would have a gapper. That is someone who jumps a void or adjusts a spark plug.

Some people call an old guy missing teeth a "gapper", but I have never seen the term in skiing.
I'd dare you to call Mike Tyson a gapper.

Go here

A gaper is one who gapes.

Cirque, I would NEVER "gape at the gap" of the dapper Mr. Tyson, let alone disparage his ruggedly handsome looks to his face. Besides, I have a bit of the Dave Letterman smile myself!

Gap on!

Anyone who is generally clueless about the lifestyle of skiing - usually those who have never been involved in the culture of skiing in any way (whether that be as a ski bum, racer, mountain/resort employee, instructor, coach, etc.). A gaper can be a clueless never-ever to a seasoned affluent patron who's season of skiing is limited to their week-long family trip to Aspen/Vail/Deer Valet/Beaver Creek/etc. They just don't know how to do everyday things that are common sense to the rest of us.

Such as:

• Not knowing you look rediculous when you go into your version of a racer tuck because your poles are sticking straight up in the air.
• Skiing in jeans.
• Skiing in wind pants.
• Skiing in a jacket in honor of your favorite NFL/NBA/NCAA/NHL sports team.
• One-piece ski suits.
• Matching ski suits that are not part of a mountain, ski school, or race program.
• Hoods with fur (fake or real) on them on your primary ski coat.
• Tucking anything that you are wearing on your legs into the top of your boots.
• Owning $4000 worth of the latest matching ski gear and not knowing how to use any of it.
• Talking about skiing "black diamonds" like it is an accomplishment.
• AC40's are your "powder ski."
• Thinking racers and other seasoned skiers are out of control because they ski faster than you do.
• Thinking that you are in control because you are skiing slower than racers and other seasoned skiers.
• Getting your $60k SUV stuck in a plowed parking lot.
• Ski totes.
• Not being able to properly shoulder your skis so that the brakes catch on one another.
• Not being able to very easily carry all of your equipment to where ever you need to go (poles, skis, boots, bag, etc.).
• Boot gloves.
• Ski boots that are 2+ sizes too big.
• Bending your cheap poles so they mimic a GS race pole.
• Talking all the way up the lift about "ripping carves on that last run" and then executing a backseat skidded snowplow/stem christie all the way down the blue groomer of choice for that run.
• Asking fellow lift riders: "so how do those new parabolics work?"
• On a powder day asking the guy with fat skis on next to you on the lift: "are those water skis?"
• Asking your fellow lift rider who is wearing a GS suit, shin guards, punch guards on their poles, helmet with a chin bar and visor, and slalom skis: "do you race?"
• Flat filing the base edge of your skis in the parking lot with a 12" bastard file that you found in your garage that morning.
• Refusing to ski the same trail twice in one day, regardless of how good the conditions were.
• Bragging about how fast you ski.
• Renting a bright yellow Hummer H3 when you are on a ski vacation.
• Wondering why anyone would ever want to hike to make turns.
• Assuming that ski season ends in mid-March.
• Assuming that ski season begins the week after christmas.
• You post on EpicSki.com asking about the BEST all-mountain ski this year. :

Feel free to add to the list.

Later

GREG

Someone who's new to skiing. Who has a lot left to discover in the moutain and shows enthusiasm and willingness to progress in the sport.
Some people, strangely, think it's bad thing and feel obliged to make fun of it.

Hell, I thought it was just bein an OLD fart

Anyone less endowed than yourself in the skis, penile or experience categories.

Gapers are only recognized by posers. The rest don't care.

Generally, the old idiom "If you have to ask..." probably applies.

That being said, however, I'll stick up for Trotski in this regard and state he's not a gaper.

ding...ding...ding; and today’s gaper, poser, troll trifecta winner is…

I had a thread that pretty much nailed it in the Humor forum a while back.

Seriously - being a gaper has nothing to do with your ability level or where you're from or what runs you ski or what equiptment you use or what you wear or how you wear it. Being a gaper has everything to do with your attitude. Do you think that buying a lift ticket entitles you to behave like a complete a$$hole? You're a gaper. Do you enjoy cutting low traverses through uncut snow? You're a gaper. Do you ski up to the steepest chute in sight and then side-slip down the whole thing? You're a gaper. Do you expect everyone behind you on a traverse to just wait while you catch your breath or find your camera/cellphone (instead of moving off the track and letting them pass)? You're a gaper. I could go on and on, but I think you get the idea. Hope this helps.

That's great. Now if I ever meet you I'm going to have to kill you.

You nailed this one.

It's like a George Carlin joke. The guy who passes you is an a**hole and the guy who you pass is a dumbs**t

Looking forward to it.

Origins of gaper
1. A large rasor clam aka Geoduck(gooeyduck)
2. Awe, being in awe, awed, staring slackjawed, gaping in awe