It does take years... sorry.
I had each shoulder scoped, not the full slap. I also have dislocated both after surgery.
I still use those rubberbands to exercise... everyday.
I haven't dislocated for a couple of years, but just two weeks absent of PT and I feel it wobbling around in there. A few days absent of PT and my tight muscles get slack and my joints begin to hurt.
There is nothing religious about exercising your shoulder. You just simply do it every day or end up angry as all hell because it blew because you couldn't dedicate 20 minutes after breakfast.
That's just the way it is.
Pushups are the best long-term pain reliever. Once you regain ROM, do pushups everyday, and minor PT stuff and you'll never be sore.
Actually, I'm so hooked on pushups as pain reliever, that I even started doing them once 20 minutes after a dislocation on a ski resort floor. Jaws were dropping... I just couldn't articulate how good it felt.
Oh... and don't be discouraged by that. There is nothing wrong with exercising every day. Your wife will love it
and... your posture will be stronger, giving you even more confidence when you enter a room full of strangers. Having a staunch chest rules. Good luck.