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A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobies are there?'

The surprised Father answers, 'Well son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her 20s, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s to 40s they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50 they are like onions'.


'Yes, you see them and they make you cry'.

This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, 'Mum, how many kinds of 'Willies' are there?'

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers ' Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In his 20s, his willie is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s to 40s, it is like a birch, flexible and reliable. After his 50s, it is like a Christmas Tree.'

'A Christmas Tree?'

'Yes - dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.'