Originally Posted by Phil Pugliese
We have done the same thing. Your Son is a junior, not fair to them to pull them out before their senior year. Something else will come along, something better.
Well, I beg to differ a bit. My daughter changed in between her Sophomore and Junior years so that we could move here to Whitefish. She had been in the same school system in NJ since nursery school, so needless to say, she left a lot of good friends behind. And it was tougher to do than we expected. Even though she understood and agreed with our thinking (coming up in a bit), when the actual move came, she had a tough Junior year. The school was smaller, most of the kids have known each other since the cradle and neither of her sports (gymnastics and ski racing) was a high school sport. She had earned her letter in gymnastics in her freshman year, so had been an official school jock back in NJ. All of a sudden, that was gone. Ski racing both helped and hurt her socially. Her training for race season started in late September, four days a week. Obviously, some social life was lost. BUT, traveling around to all the races also made her closer to the kids on the team. So, she had few friends her Junior year, but they became good friends. Then, all of a sudden senior year she realized that her circle of friends here had kept growing and growing and she had a blast her senior year here. Would she have had as much of a blast back home? Hard to say. Oddly, one of the close friends she left behind moved to California. Two of the others suddenly didn't hang out with each other anymore. She discovered she had been the glue for her NJ circle and they all went their separate ways after she left. They all still communicate with her via email, text messaging, phone, Facebook, etc. But lots of times she is telling each of them what the other is doing.
What was the thinking behind the timing of our move? Well, financially it sure didn't make any sense. I had to quit the job I had (mucho bucks) and that pretty much precluded me getting a full pension like I would have received had I stayed. My husband kept his job or we couldn't do it. But we didn't know that he would be able to keep it until we already had the house about 80% finished, so obviously it was something we were going to do whether it made financial sense or not. I wanted to do it because I felt that our hectic schedule back east was causing us to be totally out of touch with each other. With me pretty much retired from a real job, the husband working at home and the daughter attending school and race training both within 20 minutes of the house, we had more time together. Moving while she was still in high school meant that Whitefish is her home now and not "that place my parents moved to" that she has no ties to when she is off from college. She comes home for college breaks and she has friends here. If we had waited (like my husband's parents did) until she went to college, she would have come home and had no friends, nothing to do, and a tough time meeting people. So, you'll find me a big proponent of mid-school transitions.
That being said, I don't think I'd make the split between junior and senior year. We had two years for her to get in the local groove.
By the way, real estate has gone up about 7 to 10 TIMES since we bought land here in 2000, at least the stuff within .5 mile of our house.