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FEMALE PRAYER



Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep.



One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long.



One who thinks before he speaks, one who'll call -- not wait for weeks.



I pray he's gainfully employed, when I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.



Pulls out my chair and opens my door, massages my back and begs to do more.



Oh, send me a man who'll make love to my mind. Knows what to answer to, "How big is my behind?"



I pray that this man will love me to no end and always be my very best friend.



Amen.



MALE PRAYER



I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a boat.



This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.



Amen.