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Bumper Stickers II

post #1 of 23
Thread Starter 
All men are idiots, and I married their King.

So many stupid people... so few comets.

Your kid may be an honors student, but you're still an idiot.

Cover me. I'm changing lanes.

I Brake for no apparent reason.

Learn from your parents' mistakes -- use birth control.

Forget about World Peace...Visualize using your turn signal.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you.

Auntie Em, Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. Dorothy.

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.

I love cats...they taste just like chicken.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.

Work is for people who don't know how to fish.

Montana -- At least our cows are sane! My favorite

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

If you don't like the news, go out and make some.

Sorry, I don't date outside my species.

Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.

Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

OK, who stopped payment on my reality check?

Few women admit their age; fewer men act it.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW.

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist.

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.

Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Very funny, Scotty, now beam down my clothes.

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...

There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.

Keep honking...I'm reloading....

I know.......more lame internet humor :
post #2 of 23
Quote:
Montana -- At least our cows are sane! My favorite
I'll suggest that as a slogan for Montana branded beef...
post #3 of 23

nah!

Wasn't lame ... one of the best lists I've seen ....tanks!
post #4 of 23
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by nolo
I'll suggest that as a slogan for Montana branded beef...
Montana,no Mad cow.....just one very angry lawyer
post #5 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by BillA
There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.
No, no, no!

There are 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary, and those who don't.

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Don't understand? Ask a geek.
post #6 of 23
How about these:

-Squirrel, it's what's for dinner.

-Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
post #7 of 23
Seen on an SUV on Main Street in New Glarus:
Who's the President of the United States?
(The answer is a no brainer)
post #8 of 23
There's a car on my block that has two bumper stickers:

"And I'm STILL mad at Yoko"

"You can't spell CRAP without RAP"
post #9 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by ssh
No, no, no!

There are 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary, and those who don't..
The only thing funnier than that, is the fact that I can add columns of numbers faster in binary and octal than I can in decimal.
post #10 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stache
The only thing funnier than that, is the fact that I can add columns of numbers faster in binary and octal than I can in decimal.
Clearly, you carry better than most...
post #11 of 23
"Montana -- At least our cows are sane! "

yeah thats really funny, especially as the US beef industry slowly goes in the toilet from lack of product to process.
all because when Canadians find BSE they report it and the protectionist US industry covers it up or denies...
post #12 of 23
Waxman, WAXMAN...... Not in the humor forum! Tsk tsk!
post #13 of 23
Overheard in the dressing room of the Backstage Theatre in Breckenridge:

"I came here to act! I don't want all this drama!"
post #14 of 23
More bumper sitckers

Don't bother knocking if the Van is rockin.
Don't laugh, your daughter may be in this car.

You toucha my truck----I breaka you face

Lifes to short to waste on psycho chicks

and finally seen on a rusted camoflauged Ford Bronco in Denver

My kid beat up your Honor Student !
post #15 of 23
PETA
People Eating Tasty Animals
post #16 of 23
Bonni, sorry but what why does NAFTA mean "FREE" for the US and the other signatories get screwed?
post #17 of 23
The Japanese have the solution to the mad cow problem: test EVERY cow.
post #18 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ghost
The Japanese have the solution to the mad cow proble
...As do the Hindi

"Don't have a cow, man!" -- Apu
post #19 of 23
Bumper sticker in the red states - 10 out of 10 terrorists agree: Anybody but Bush

In the blue states - Nobody died when Clinton lied
post #20 of 23
"Cover me. I'm changing lanes." This is sooooo apt for Canberra cars. If you indicate that you're changing lanes, or look like you're going to, they close the gap so you can't come into "their" lane. Watching Canberra drivers try to merge is hilarious but strangely depressing.

In the US this season, I saw two local cars with bumper stickers... I liked their ironic hidden subtlety..

"Send Bush Back to the Moon"
and
"Bush is a LIAR"
post #21 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by ant
"Cover me. I'm changing lanes." This is sooooo apt for Canberra cars. If you indicate that you're changing lanes, or look like you're going to, they close the gap so you can't come into "their" lane. Watching Canberra drivers try to merge is hilarious but strangely depressing.
Same thing around here. I keep using my indicators anyway... :
post #22 of 23
Kenworth Bull Wagon-Right of Way-I'm in the right and your in my way.
On an Older Pink Cadillac-Die Yuppy Scum.
Tahoe SUV-Only Users Lose Drugs.
My Xploder-Ski Naked
post #23 of 23
Have you seen the t-shirt with the four mean-looking renegade Apaches (I think)? The caption says: Homeland Security! Working for you since 1492!
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