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The Sex Therapist

post #1 of 3
Thread Starter 
A Florida couple, both well into their 70's, go to a sex therapist's office.

The doctor asks, "What can I do for you?" The man says, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?" The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.

When the couple finishes, the doctor says, "There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse." He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says goodbye.

The next week, however, the couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees. This happens several weeks in a row. The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leaves.

Finally, after 5 or 6 weeks of this routine, the doctor says, "I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you try to find out?"

The old man says, "We're not trying to find out anything. She's married and we can't go to her house. I'm married and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Medicare.
post #2 of 3
Bernie and Ida living in the nursing home decide to get married at 75. They think they better have a doctor's blessing before hand so they both go to the physician for complete workups. Meeting with the couple the doctor is asked by Ida "Well Doc how is my Bernie?" Doc says "Bernie is fine and will have no trouble performing any husbandly duties." Bernie asks "How is my Ida?" Doc says "Bernie, I will be honest with you. Ida has acute angina." Bernies says "I know that's why I want to marry her."
post #3 of 3
Nursing Home

Howard is the senior member of the nursing home and at the age of 94 still gets around pretty good. One of his favorite places to go is the garden where he can sit in seclusion and ponder his life's accomplishments.

One day another member of the home named Annebel walks in and the two begin to talk. Soon the conversation turns to sex and Howard says "that's what I miss most of all." The woman looks at the frail Howard and says "you old coot...what makes you think you can still get it up?" "I suppose you're right" says Howard "but at least it would be nice if someone would just hold it." The old woman saw no harm in this and agreed to "hold it" and this activity went on everyday for a couple of weeks.

One day Annebel went into the garden to be with Howard and he was nowhere to be found. She was told he was last seen in room 905 so off she went. Annebel arrives at room 905 and is shocked to find Howard with another nursing home member named Mabel. They are sitting together and Mabel is "holding it", Annebel instantly becomes irrate and shouts "Howard, how could you do this to me, what does she have that I don't have?"...Howard just smiles and says "parkinsons".
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