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Random thoughts

post #1 of 2
Thread Starter 
Now that food has replaced sex in my life,
I can't even get into my own pants.

Marriage changes passion.
Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it.
So I said "Implants?" She hit me.

How come we choose from just two people to run for
president and 50 for Miss America

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but,
a true friend will be sitting next to you saying,
"Darn...that was fun!"

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear
loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing,
I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping,"
now I just "chunky dunk."

Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able
to tell the difference.

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we
could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?

post #2 of 2
Might I add:

Never argue with a child. If you win you're a bully. If you loose you're an idiot.
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