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Why I fired my secretary!

post #1 of 2
Thread Starter 
Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that
morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say,

"Happy Birthday!", and probably have a present for me.

As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any
happy birthday. I thought, well, that' s wives for you, the children will
remember... The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word.
So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent..

As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss.
"Happy Birthday." And I felt a little better that someone had

I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You
know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go
to lunch, just you and me." I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day. 'Let's go!" We went to lunch.

We didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private
little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the
way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We
don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not."

She said, "Let's go to my apartment." After arriving at her apartment
she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and
slip into something more comfortable."

"Sure" I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and....., in
about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake

----- followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday.

And I just sat there ---- on the couch ---- naked.
post #2 of 2
sounds sorta like that joke about the blindfolded guy with horrific gas, who thinks he's at the dining room table alone, when actually there are family & friends gathered 'round horrified at his flatulent expulsions.

nice one feallen!
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