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Menopausal Barbie Doll

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 
1. Bifocals Barbie. Comes with her own set of blended-lens
fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain,
and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.

2. Hot Flash Barbie. Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch
her face turn
beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead.

Comes with handheld fan and tiny tissues.

3. Facial Hair Barbie. As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her
whiskers grow. Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying

4. Flabby Arms Barbie. Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with
these new,roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news on the tummy front,
two-MuMus with tummy-support panels are included.

5. Bunion Barbie. Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels
have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet.
Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on
soft terry mules.

6. No-More-Wrinkles Barbie. Erase those pesky crow's-feet and
lip lines
with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of
age-blasting cosmetics.

7. Soccer Mom Barbie. All that experience as a cheerleader is
really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school
megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan in
robin-egg blue or white and cooler filled with doughnut holes and
fruit punch.

8. Mid-life Crisis Barbie. It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a
and Alonzo (her personal trainer) is just what the doctor
ordered, along with Prozac. They're hopping in her new red Miata
and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B&B. Includes a real
tape of "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do."

9. Divorced Barbie. Sells for$ 199..99. Comes with Ken's
house, Ken's car, and Ken's boat.

10. Recovery Barbie. Too many parties have finally caught up with
ultimate party girl. Now she does Twelve Steps instead of dance
steps. Clean and sober, she's going to meetings religiously.
Comes with a little copy of The Big Book and a six-pack of Diet

11. Post-Menopausal Barbie. This Barbie wets her pants when
she sneezes, forgets where she puts things, and cries a lot.
She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching the
tube, clicking through the channels. Comes with Depends and
Kleenex. As a bonus this year, the book "Getting In Touch with
Your Inner Self" is included.
post #2 of 8
post #3 of 8
I always wondered why Barbie never had any children until someone pointed out that Ken always came in a box.

post #4 of 8
Thread Starter 
Slider, great mp3s!!!
post #5 of 8
Tanks Lisamarie,

I'll be adding some more down the road, is it snow yet? :
post #6 of 8
Slider -

Checked out the site. Where is the link to EpicSki?
post #7 of 8
Epic Ski has been linked Rio. I rebuilt kokotele and missed that very important link. Thanks. Here are 2 pictures of the Toolbox fire at Silver Lake, Oregon. And the last picture is of the world famous Cowboy Dinner Tree. Don't eat the beans. :

post #8 of 8
What, no Botox-party Barbie?
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