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How to have a happy marriage, by SCSA

post #1 of 4
Thread Starter 
It is important for men to remember that as women grow
older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same
quality of house- keeping as they did when they were
younger. When men notice this, they should try not to
Let me relate how I handle the situation. When I chucked
my job and took early retirement a year ago, it became
necessary for my wife to get a full-time job both for
extra income and for health insurance benefits that we
She was a trained lab tech when we met thirty some years
ago and was fortunate to land a job at the local medical
center as a phlebotomist. It was shortly after she
started working at this job that I noticed that she was
beginning to show her age. I usually get home from
skiing about the same time she gets home
from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she
almost always says that she has to rest for half an hour
or so before she starts supper. I try not to yell at her
when this happens. Instead, I tell her to take her time.
I understand that she is not as young as she used to be.
I just tell her to wake me when she finally does get
supper on the table.

She used to wash and dry the dishes as soon as we
finished eating. It is now not unusual for them to sit
on the table for several hours after supper. I do what I
can by reminding her several times each evening that
they aren't cleaning themselves. I know she appreciates
this, as it does seem to help her get them done before
she goes to bed.

Our washer and dryer are in the basement. When she was
younger, she used to be able to go up and down the
stairs all day and not get tired. Now that she is older
she seems to get tired so much more quickly. Sometimes
she says she just can't make another trip down those
steps. I don't make a big issue of this. As long as she
finishes up the laundry the next evening I am willing to
overlook it. Not only that, but unless I need something
ironed to wear to the Monday's lodge meeting or to
Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club or to Tuesday's or
Thursday's bowling or something like that, I will tell
her to wait until the next evening to do the ironing.
This gives her a little more time to do some of those
odds and ends things like shampooing the dog, vacuuming,
or dusting.

Also, if I have had a really good day fishing, this
allows her to gut and scale the fish at a more leisurely
pace. Mrs. SCSA is starting to complain a little
occasionally. Not often, mind you, but just enough for
me to notice. For example, she will say that it is
difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills
during her lunch hour. In spite of her complaining, I
continue to try to offer encouragement. I tell her to
stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she
won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that
missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her
any, if you know what I mean.

When doing simple jobs she seems to think she needs more
rest periods than she used to have to take. A couple of
weeks ago she said she had to take a break when she was
only half finished mowing the yard. I overlook comments
like these because I realize it's just age talking. In
fact, I try to not embarrass her when she needs these
little extra rest breaks. I tell her to fix herself a
nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and
just sit for a while. I tell her that as long as she is
making one for herself, she may as well make one for me
and take her break by the hammock so she can talk with
me until I fall asleep.

I could go on and on, but I think you know where I'm
coming from. I know that I probably look like a saint in
the way I support her on a daily basis. I'm not saying
that the ability to show this much consideration is
easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it
impossible. No one knows better than I do how
frustrating women can become as they get older.

My purpose in writing this is simply to suggest that you
make the effort. I realize that achieving the exemplary
level of showing consideration I have attained is out of
reach for the average man. However guys, even if you
just yell at your wife a little less often because of
this article, I will consider that writing it was
post #2 of 4
post #3 of 4
To bad this is a family forum. I was hopping for a bit of advice on the naughty bits, you know, wink, wink, nudge, nudge ... the naughty bits. Help out SCSA. Jump right in!
post #4 of 4
Mrs.SCSA wears the pants in the family.
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