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post #1 of 3
Thread Starter 
Finally, The Straight Dope On Food & Exercise
> > Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can
> > prolong life. Is this true?
> > A: Your heart is only good for so many beats,
> > and that's it. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart
> > will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the
> > life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
> > Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits
> > and vegetables?
> > A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies.
> > What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables.
> > So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering
> > vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good
> > source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give
> > you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of
> > vegetable slop.
> > Q: Is beer or wine bad for me?
> > A: Look, it goes to the earlier point about
> > fruits and vegetables. As we all know,
> > scientists divide everything in the world into three categories: animal,
> > mineral, and vegetable. We all know that beer and wine are not animal,
> > and they're not on the periodic table of elements, so that only leaves
> > one thing, right? My advice: Have a burger and a beer and enjoy your
> > liquid vegetables.
> > Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
> > A: Well, if you have a body, and you have body fat,
> > your ratio's one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to
> > one, etc.
> > Q: At the gym, a guy asked me to "spot" for him while
> > he did the bench press. What did he mean?
> > A: "Spotting" for someone means you stand over him
> > while he blows air up your shorts. It's an accepted practice at health
> > clubs; though if you find that it becomes the ONLY reason why you're
> > going in, you probably ought to reevaluate your exercise program.
> > Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in
> > a regular exercise program?
> > A: Sorry...Can't think of a single one. My philosophy
> > is: No Pain - No Pain.
> > Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little
> > soft around the middle?
> > A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it
> > gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger
> > stomach.
> > I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had.
post #2 of 3
very funny
post #3 of 3
A: My philosophy is: No Pain - No Pain.

mine too!!!
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