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post #1 of 5
Thread Starter 
A little Christmas cheer for all from the Australian Bureau of Statistics circa 2000

31 Australians have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Australians have died in the last 3 years by eating Christmas decorations they believed were chocolate.

Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling incidents.

101 Australians since 1997 have had to have broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.

18 Australians had serious burns in 1998 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Australians were admitted to casualty in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth or eye socket.

5 Australians were injured last year in accidents involving out of control scalextric cars.

3 Australians die each year testing if a 9V battery works on their tongue.

142 Australians were injured in 1998 by not removing all the pins from new shirts.
58 Australians are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.

and finally:

8 Australians cracked their skull in 1997 after falling asleep (passing out) while throwing up into the toilet.
post #2 of 5
oh, TOO, TOO good!!
post #3 of 5
They admit to that?
post #4 of 5
admit to it ? you mean brag about it ! its the stuff legends are made of...to tell your kids about... guess what daddy did when he was younger...
post #5 of 5
Thread Starter 
The same way they brag about their family's criminal records that got them deported in the first place. I had to laugh the last time I was in Sydney to hear how people were proud of their ancestors if they were criminals on the first ships to arrive, and even more proud if their great, great, grandparents were mass murderers on the first ships.

Still, any country that uses the word "ba$tard" as a term of endearment is cool in my book.

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