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A hesitant newbie

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 

I was hoping I could get some input from some of you. Someone I know has had really bad experiences with skiing in the past. Since the last incident in which he was carried down the mountain by ski patrol due to a crash, he hasn't wanted anything to do with skiing. What I want to know is: A) Have you had a similar experience before, and B) How did you talk to them about it? Did they ever give it another go, or did they just refuse to participate. It's a huge family activity and he always seems to get left out. Any suggestions?

post #2 of 17
My husband had two accidents on the first day of the season, a year apart. Then I slammed into a tree. He refuses to go AT ALL. I still ski. It's been years since he went out and at this point I've given up. After all, I certainly can't say nothing will happen and if he went out and got hurt again? Not worth it.
post #3 of 17


My wife has had three significant knee injuries and still goes out every day whe can. She is driven to be out there.

 

I think the quesition to ask your friend is, "Do you wish you could get back out there?" If the answer is no, then I think you are done. If the answer is yes then you have something to work with.

post #4 of 17
Quote:
Since the last incident in which he was carried down the mountain by ski patrol due to a crash, he hasn't wanted anything to do with skiing.

That should end it.
post #5 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gearspoke View Post
 

I was hoping I could get some input from some of you. Someone I know has had really bad experiences with skiing in the past. Since the last incident in which he was carried down the mountain by ski patrol due to a crash, he hasn't wanted anything to do with skiing. What I want to know is: A) Have you had a similar experience before, and B) How did you talk to them about it? Did they ever give it another go, or did they just refuse to participate. It's a huge family activity and he always seems to get left out. Any suggestions?


I've heard of plenty of people who return to skiing after injury.  Not so many stories of people who quit, but them that's to be expected on online ski forums.  Every situation is unique.  What region was your friend skiing in?  What ability level?

post #6 of 17

I have two friends who suffered injuries their first days out skiing.  Both attempted this as adults.

Neither ever went skiing again, and have intense negative memories of their experience.  

When I suggest trying again, they refuse big time.  This is so sad as they are losing out on so much fun.

post #7 of 17
A friend who played on the same O45 Soccer Club as me damaged his achilles at the end of the summer season. He has come out for post game beers while we play indoor this winter but has come to the conclusion that this injury has so screwed up/inconvenienced his life that he is going to give up soccer so it doesn't happen again. Not even interested in recreational play with significantly less risk of injury. Perhaps your friend has just had enough "bad experiences" that he/she chooses not to risk more? Seems like a rational choice was made.
post #8 of 17
Thread Starter 
The problem is that it happened on an abnormally slushy day, and it was only his second time out. Both times before he seemed to enjoy himself. What happened the last time wasn't even his fault, he was hit by a snowboarder going way too fast in a blue area. What I'm trying to convince him, is that that was a freak accident and that it's most likely not going to happen again.One suggestion I received was that I film the next good day we have and let him watch the video to see that it's not always the same experience that he had. As you can see, it's not a rational fear, and It's sad for everyone when he's stuck at home. I think he wishes he could be out there with us, but is too embarrassed. So, shrugging him off while I catch the next lift is not what I had in mind... Any other suggestions?
post #9 of 17
Given that we all know that skiing is very much a "head game", you are starting out from behind. You are going to need ideal conditions, an empty hill, and to leave him go at his own pace. Which will not mean telling him to come to the top after two runs, but strictly at his own speed. In fact, I'd suggest you shouldn't even be present, as it is clear you have your agenda, which is to pressure him. Pressuring some people just makes them dig in their heels even worse. Better to bring him to the lodge to keep a table warm for lunch and let him watch and finally decide it looks like fun, if you can't get him to take a lesson.
post #10 of 17
Thread Starter 

Thanks, those are great ideas. I've seen him under pressure from the rest of the family, so adding more isn't what. I just think that he's never had a good opportunity to learn without all the anxiety. Thanks again for the insight.

post #11 of 17

I'm thinking along the lines of how little kids are introduced to skiing for the first time.  The "usual procedure" as posted here (I don't have kids so I don't have first hand experience with this...) seems to be to just bring them to a ski area.  If they want to put ski boots on, great, if not, great.  If they just want to make snow angels, great.  If they want to click into skis and clomp around the base area for five minutes before wanting to go home, great.

 

If your friend doesn't want to go skiing based on negative past experiences -- go sledding or ice skating or just on a winter hike in the woods or something.  Basically, I'd think the first step is to just get them outside, get them used to being in the snow and cold..  There are ways to do that that don't involve skiing.  But they don't put ski boots on until they want to and they most certainly don't click into skis until they're damned good and ready to click in.

post #12 of 17
Thread Starter 

Oh he's definitely an outdoorsy type of person. He's just being stubborn about it and like I said, a little embarrassed. Sledding is a great idea actually. I can work with that I think! That's the perfect way to ease him in seeing as how the ski area and tubing area are right next to each other at our spot. Even if that's where it ends, he would still be able to come up with us! Thanks for the input

post #13 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gearspoke View Post
 

Oh he's definitely an outdoorsy type of person. He's just being stubborn about it and like I said, a little embarrassed. Sledding is a great idea actually. I can work with that I think! That's the perfect way to ease him in seeing as how the ski area and tubing area are right next to each other at our spot. Even if that's where it ends, he would still be able to come up with us! Thanks for the input


Is there any ice skating near/at the ski area?  That's the common winter sport that seems to require skills related to skiing, especially the balance aspect.

 

I have a friend who used to trips with us when she wanted her daughter to learn to ski as a tween.  My friend had done some skiing as a kid because her father liked to ski and took the entire family until it was clear only one son was really interested.  She was not interested in alpine skiing at all.  But she loved to join us for snow tubing.

post #14 of 17
I grew up in a pretty ski heavy area in CT, most of my friends came from skiing families, but I most certainly did not. In the early 90's, while most of my friends were already comfortable skiing, I decided to try snowboarding. It was difficult to learn and the process was largely done alone as the friends I traveled to the mountain with were all off skiing terrain I wasn't ready for. I rushed trying to join them and found myself even more frustrated. When I finally injured a knee I gave up the idea for good.

My wife, who was in this group of friends, grew up skiing but until our kids came along did not ski much. Largely because there was no way I was going to go through trying to learn again, even if "skiing is way easier." The mountain just wasn't for me.

I took the role of ski dad, dropping off and picking up while Mom taught and skied with the boys. Chauffeur, if you will. But last year my seven year old really started pressing about how I should ski. "It's easy, I'll teach you!"

I begrudgingly agreed. Despite being out of out of shape, overweight and lacking any confidence that I'd ever be a skier, I tried at age 38 to ski for the first time.

First my calves hurt. Then my quads. Then my feet. I went real slow and rode the carpet with children I towered over. But I kept going.

In two weekends, it will be the one year anniversary of that first carpet ride and I will have gone skiing 55 days.

And other than wanting to share the story, I wanted to add that it only happened because of the support and encouragement of others. My kids skied with me, my wife skied with me. They went at a pace that stayed with Dad. They didn't say "let's go to the other chair, you'll be fine." They helped me get there. The dude who helped kids get on the carpet gave me encouragement. I was as nervous about it as I could have been, but them spending time with me made it easy. Most of my anxiety was based on everyone I didn't know. My favorite runs are still the ones where it just feels like us. First thing in the morning, freshly groomed and quiet. Create an environment where there's nothing to be anxious about and it can just be fun.
post #15 of 17
That was a really long first post. Is there a previous record?

OMG tl;dr. Go early wink.gif
post #16 of 17

Some mountains allow/rent snow bikes. The type with the foot pegs are tricky for a beginner but the ones that have short skis (18-24"  I think) offer great stability because there is also a ski where each bike wheel would normally be. Most beginners can be doing blue squares in a couple of days or so.

post #17 of 17
Thread Starter 

I really love the ideas! Thanks so much for all of the input folks. There is actually an indoor skating ring right down the road from us, so maybe I'll invite him to go one day. Again, thanks guys! It gives me a lot of things to think about on how to get him out there again. I'm going to try a few things and post the results. I feel like there is a lot of people out there who have had similar experiences, so Info like this might help bring some people back to our awesome sport!

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