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How to write a complaint letter

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 

There is an art to writing good complaint letters to ski area management.  Its summer here in the North and ski area management has nothing better to do with their time but read complaint letters.  Why not make it a good one. This is a letter that people can learn from.  I know I have.  Its short, to the point and any manager will remember it for sure.  They may even send it up their management chain.  Maybe we can write some typical form ski area complaint letters  here on EPICSKI that people can use at their favorite mountain(s).  

Originally published in April 2013, the letter gained momentum online after Sir Richard Branson
tweeted his more than 3 million followers in June, "How to write a complaint letter – read this hilarious note from a frustrated airline passenger."

Dear LIAT,

May I say how considerate it is of you to enable your passengers such an in-depth and thorough tour of the Caribbean.

 

Most other airlines I have travelled on would simply wish to take me from point A to B in rather a hurry. I was intrigued that we were allowed to stop at not a lowly one or two but a magnificent six airports yesterday. And who wants to fly on the same airplane the entire time? We got to change and refuel every step of the way!

 

I particularly enjoyed sampling the security scanners at each and every airport. I find it preposterous that people imagine them all to be the same. And as for being patted down by a variety of islanders, well, I feel as if I’ve been hugged by most of the Caribbean already.

 

I also found it unique that this was all done on “island time,” because I do like to have time to absorb the atmosphere of the various departure lounges. As for our arrival, well, who wants to have to take a ferry at the end of all that flying anyway? I’m glad the boat was long gone by the time we arrived into Tortola last night — and that all those noisy bars and restaurants were closed.

 

So thank you, LIAT. I now truly understand why you are “The Caribbean Airline.”

 

P.S. Keep the bag. I never liked it anyway.

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/01/liat-complaint-letter-arthur-hicks-branson_n_3529385.html

post #2 of 8

I met Richard twice in the late 80's when I was involved in a TransAtlantic world speed record that beat his time with his Virgin Atlantic. Because there was no real trophy for fast boats / yachts, only the Hales Trophy for passenger carrying ships, Richard made up his own trophy of a silver "Bishop's Rock Lighthouse" which is the official finish line for fastest time across the Atlantic.

 

I've met many wealthy and successful people due to my work, but Richard will always stand out as a real free spirit and seemingly good guy, sort of what's conveyed in that note.

post #3 of 8

Arthur's experience flying commercial in the out Islands is fairly typical.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Richard doesn't have to worry about flying commercial.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It's good to be Richard!

post #4 of 8
Thread Starter 

This thread took a turn I had no idea was coming when I started it.  Maybe for the better.  It would seem pictures are more interesting than good writing skills.  Okay then. 
 

post #5 of 8
Quote:
Originally Posted by SHREDHEAD View Post

Arthur's experience flying commercial in the out Islands is fairly typical.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Richard doesn't have to worry about flying commercial.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It's good to be Richard!

Let's see them do that on snow skis.

post #6 of 8

A polite letter works best, like "Dear Sir Richard, Congratulations, your  twin sister will star in 'Snog Marry Avoid'. She's definitely in need of a make-under".

*

post #7 of 8
Quote:
Originally Posted by catskills View Post

This thread took a turn I had no idea was coming when I started it.  Maybe for the better.  It would seem pictures are more interesting than good writing skills.  Okay then. 
 

 

Well, I suspect your thread went off the rails because you mentioned Richard Branson, who can be a hot button for people. I have some opinions on him as well, but they're relevant only to the kiteboard scene (rather than the skiing scene). 

 

Regarding the letter itself, it's a good comedy piece, but I find myself wondering what the author intended to achieve. Such a letter will not persuade anyone on an airline to make changes. It could net you some swag or other "free stuff" in exchange for trouble, though a matter-of-fact letter would achieve the same goal (possibly better). 

 

catskills, what is your complaint about ski area management that you want addressed? 

post #8 of 8
Quote:
Originally Posted by Metaphor_ View Post
 Such a letter will not persuade anyone on an airline to make changes. It could net you some swag or other "free stuff" in exchange for trouble, though a matter-of-fact letter would achieve the same goal (possibly better). 

Sometimes there's more than just a bit of schwag. Some of the lurkers here received a kerzillion free frequent flyer points with carefully crafted dealings with a credit card company's promo. The insider intel on forums ran to 500 pages as everyone compared notes and second guessed what the bank was up to. When the bank claimed they could turn thew promo 'off' after 3 days due to their terms and conditions, they breached casino and lottery laws than ban companies from turning off promos without approval from the casino authority. When they threatened they were big and rich and had huge lawyers, they realised there are government agencies and auditors with big lawyers, badges and handcuffs. And when one airline saved itself a forecast $100m by cancelling a route and tickets with impugnity, it interfered with contracts with US airlines and got fined $A100m in the end by the FBI'DoJ, $A20m by another agency etc ... and ponied up lots of free flights. Writing a good complaint letter  is a lot of funbiggrin.gif

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