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I finally did it!

post #1 of 25
Thread Starter 

I present to you, the formula for the perfect turn.  This formula, if performed correctly on snow, will cause you to do the perfect turn on any terrain in any conditions.  You're welcome.

 

perfect turn

post #2 of 25

You just don't get it, because that ain't it.

post #3 of 25

Brilliant! I'll have to apply that formula next time I'm on the hill. I'm blaming you if it doesn't work as advertised! Haha.

post #4 of 25

You rock

post #5 of 25

There seems to be a mathematical error in your formula.

post #6 of 25

I forgot to carry the one.

extreme-ski-4.jpg

post #7 of 25

Is the answer really 6?

post #8 of 25
Thread Starter 

If performed correctly the formula should cause your turn should look like this:  The Perfect Turn

 

stein.jpg

post #9 of 25

He should widen his skis. He looks like a slob. I thought you would know better, Chaos.

post #10 of 25
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by skiking4 View Post

He should widen his skis. He looks like a slob. I thought you would know better, Chaos.



If you had taken time to study my formula you would see that it takes into account the sidecut of the skis.  As Stein is on straight skis, a wider stance in not necessary to achieve proper edge contact.  Don't ever question me again.

post #11 of 25

Actually, the derivative of the formula yields the optimal turn.  You've got to differentiate that equation to arrive at the perfect turn.  I hope you are good with the chain rules..tongue.gif

post #12 of 25
Thread Starter 

My formula requires no differentiation, only a rudimentary understanding of mathematics...and stuff.

post #13 of 25

You stole my formula, damn it!

post #14 of 25


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Abox View Post

I forgot to carry the one.

extreme-ski-4.jpg



Well, I divided by zero.

 

divide-by-zero-wtf-bird-parrot-nuclear-explosion-fuck-divide-demotivational-poster-1206035499.jpg

post #15 of 25

If I apply it in reverse, will it cause me to ski uphill? Backwards? If so, note to self: Need twin tips.

Deliberating - 1

post #16 of 25
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by deliberate1 View Post

If I apply it in reverse, will it cause me to ski uphill? Backwards? If so, note to self: Need twin tips.

Deliberating - 1



I'm only going to offer this warning once: if any sort of alteration is made to my formula, terrible events are likely to occur, aside from your turns looking like crap.  Reversing the formula could create a tangent universe.  You've been warned. 

post #17 of 25

I wish I had known about this earlier.  My lack of knowledge of the existence of this elegant mathematical solution has caused me vast internal damage, resulting in knee, hip, and back replacements.

 

Thank you for this wisdom!

post #18 of 25
Your formula yields a left turn. Please get back to us when you have completed the complementary calculations so that we can get back to the other side of the hill. Thank you.

Best regards,
Bob
post #19 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bob Barnes View Post

Your formula yields a left turn. Please get back to us when you have completed the complementary calculations so that we can get back to the other side of the hill.


 

Just multiply by the complex conjugate and integrate.  Piece of cake.

post #20 of 25

No wonder!  I never WAS any good at Math!ROTF.gif

post #21 of 25

I always though the answer was 42 

post #22 of 25

I could be writing a resort review to win free lift tickets but instead I'm smiling at this thread. What is wrong with me?

post #23 of 25
Quote:

 

 

perfect turn



 

I'm encoding this into a smartphone app. Just replace your iPhone/iPad touch earbuds with electrode terminals, plug in, click into your Kastle Positronic 8000s, and let 'er rip...

post #24 of 25
Quote:
Originally Posted by weems View Post

I wish I had known about this earlier.  My lack of knowledge of the existence of this elegant mathematical solution has caused me vast internal damage, resulting in knee, hip, and back replacements.


I think I need a head replacement... redface.gif
 

post #25 of 25

No, the answer is always "D: It is written".

 

@lli

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